An open body is the posture of a leader—a marker of power, dominance, and control.
Winning through gestures and expressions
Before languages were invented, our ancestors used gestures to communicate. Even today, apes—our distant relatives—use hand gestures and facial expressions to interact with others. Though we have evolved to speak, gestures and expressions continue to play a valuable role in communication. Speakers, politicians, professors, people from various fields use the power of gestures and expressions to captivate their audience and leave a lasting impression.
Imagine saying “nice to meet you” to someone with a dead look on the face. Chances are that you will receive a cold nod or a wry look in return. Why? Because even though your words expressed “pleasure” your body language yelled, “not interested”. Now repeat the same phrase with a smile and a slight hand gesture. Chances are that the person will respond with the same warmth and politeness because your words and body language expressed gratification.
Hand gestures are as important as a smile when one wants to express affection. But in what direction should your palms point—upward or downward? Palms in the upward direction communicate positivity—satisfaction, cooperation, honesty, and sincerity. So, if you wish to build trust or show gratitude to your family and friends, keep your arms open and palms up—not too far from your chest. On the contrary, if you wish to establish authority or communicate “let me do the talking” or “shut up and listen to me”, point your palms downward.
Once you know how to use your hands, it is time to focus on the head. Everyone nods during a conversation. It communicates encouragement and empathy. For instance, when a professor nods at a student’s question, it shows that the professor appreciates the student’s inquisitiveness and it also stresses upon the professor’s intent and attentiveness. One thing to watch out for is excessive nodding that could make you seem like an imposter.
Eyes can easily convey our thoughts and feelings, which makes it an integral part of our interactions
Taking the cues from the eyes
Eyes are indeed the windows to your soul. Few gestures express emotions such as joy and sorrow as strongly as the eyes. The way one looks at you, for how long they hold their gaze, whether they steal glances or completely avoid looking into your eyes reveals a shade of their personality. Eyes can easily convey your thoughts and feelings, which makes it an integral part of your interactions, formal and informal alike. Actors, for instance, like Joaquin Phoenix or Jodie Foster, evoke all kinds of emotions, just by using their eyes. Like them, you communicate through your eyes daily too. The difference is you are unaware of what your eyes might be saying.
Research shows that blinking incessantly is a sign of nervousness and stress. When anxiety hits, eyes flutter more than usual. Wandering of the eyes in any social setting, such as looking down or rolling the eyes up, underlines a lack of confidence, guilt or boredom. Holding gaze with the speaker reflects your fondness and respect. Prolonged eye contact, however, can make a person uncomfortable as well. The right balance is what one needs to find.
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