Compatibility is like a treasure that makes a relationship rich and long-lasting. Unfortunately, treasures are not easy to find. What makes compatibility elusive is a simple truth of life. Everyone is different, and so are their opinions, likes, and dislikes. In his book The Discipline Of Transcendence, spiritual leader Osho explains why people often struggle to find that ‘sweet spot’ in their relationships, which we call compatibility. He writes: “Everybody is good alone. Together, something goes wrong… Because two people live in two desire worlds, they have their own magical worlds. When they come together, those worlds clash.”
To understand the dynamics of compatibility in relationships, you need to look deeper into human consciousness. What makes people compatible or incompatible? Life choices, aspirations, world view, beliefs, and value systems bind two people together in a lasting relationship. For this reason, someone who believes in honesty, loyalty, or doing things the right way may not be compatible with someone who doesn’t put a premium on such values. Sometimes, incompatibility can even arise from ennui, indifference or emotional distance or unavailability. This being said, it doesn’t mean your relationship is destined to fail.
While conflicts due to dissimilar beliefs and value systems are difficult to iron out, partners can work to resolve other more usual differences. In this feature, Soulveda enters the realm of love and relationships to discuss compatibility and how to eliminate the differences that can exist between partners.